Oh, the taxi driver. That noble soul steering through the chaos of busy streets, dodging rogue cyclists, and deciphering addresses mumbled through a mouthful of crisps. We at the salon often hear stories—some hilarious, some downright baffling—about taxi rides. So, at Cabs In Swindon, we decided to ask our customers: What makes a good taxi driver?

Here’s what they shared, scattered with as much sense as London traffic.

A Sense of Direction (Or Something Close to It)

The first thing our customers agreed upon is that a good taxi driver ought to know where they’re going—or at least pretend convincingly. There’s nothing quite as unnerving as a driver who flips the satnav upside down while muttering, “Might be quicker through the centre, if we survive.”

But the greats? They seem to possess an uncanny knack for finding hidden streets, obscure theatres, and the one back alley pub your mate swears is “just off the main street,” but isn’t. They don’t just know the city; they seem to have made a deal with it.

Politeness Without the Pantomime

It’s not about calling everyone “guv’nor” or asking how the weather’s treating you. Good local taxi firm drivers know the art of polite disinterest. They can nod at your story about Dave from accounts while still keeping their eyes on the road and their thoughts somewhere between the Railway Museum and the moon.

Politeness, according to our patrons, is about balance. Too much cheer? Suspicious. Too little? Rude. The perfect driver knows exactly how to deliver a “Morning” that is neither too chipper nor too gruntingly Neanderthal.

The Right Amount of Chat

Ah, the eternal dance of conversation. Some passengers want a quiet ride, while others treat the back seat like a confessional booth. The best drivers, our customers reckon, can read the room—or rather, the rear-view mirror.

Mrs. Hobbs, who comes in every Thursday for her eyebrow threading, put it best: “Some days, you want to discuss the meaning of life; other days, you just want them to shut up and drive you to Tesco.” Fair enough, Mrs. Hobbs. Fair enough.

Punctuality: Not a Myth

A good taxi driver arrives when they say they’ll arrive. Or at least, they call if they’re going to be late. Rush hour traffic being what it is—a cross between a snail’s funeral and a demolition derby—punctuality might seem like wishful thinking. But those who manage it earn a halo in the eyes of their passengers.

And punctuality doesn’t just mean showing up on time. It’s also about taking the quickest route without detouring via the scenic route of gridlock or the extended tour of nowhere.

Clean Car, Happy Passenger

A surprising number of our customers mentioned the state of the car. No one’s expecting Buckingham Palace on wheels, but they do appreciate seats that aren’t sticky and a smell that doesn’t remind them of last Tuesday’s kebab.

Apparently, a taxi driver who keeps their car clean sends a message: “I respect my passengers, even if one of them spilled an entire coffee on that seat last week.”

Patience, Even with the Perpetually Lost

Taxi driving isn’t kind to the clueless. Our customers admitted that sometimes they are that clueless. They’ve forgotten the address. They don’t know the postcode. They’re not even sure if they’re in the right city. A good taxi driver doesn’t sigh loudly or look at them as if they’ve just claimed the earth is flat. Instead, they wait, give a sympathetic smile, and offer to help.

Handling the Unexpected

From avoiding a family of ducks crossing the road to calming a panicked tourist who thinks they’ve left their passport in the hotel, good drivers have nerves of steel. They don’t flinch when a lorry decides to park sideways across the junction or when a passenger insists they’ve got a shortcut through Soho at 5pm on a Friday. They adapt, adjust, and somehow reach the destination without resorting to primal screaming.

Listening to Song Requests… Sometimes

Music preferences can be a battlefield. Some of our customers love a chatty driver who’s happy to turn up the radio and debate the merits of Bowie versus The Beatles. Others appreciate silence or, at most, a gentle hum of classical music in the background. The best drivers? They’re DJs on wheels, knowing when to hit play and when to hit mute.

The End of the Journey

At the end of the day—or the journey—it’s about making passengers feel safe, respected, and not completely skint. Our customers spoke of drivers who helped with bags, waited until they got safely indoors, and didn’t charge them an extra tenner for “heavy sighing.”

A good taxi driver, it seems, isn’t just someone who ferries you from A to B. They’re part navigator, part psychologist, part comedian, and occasionally, part saint. And if they can brave a British downpour without losing their cool, they deserve a medal—or at least a decent tip.

So, next time you hop into a cab, spare a thought for the person behind the wheel. They’re not just driving; they’re surviving, one roundabout at a time.